Who is on your other side?
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WHO IS ON YOUR OTHER SIDE?
I am not going to talk about elections or politics. At least, not yet. And if I do, trust that it will be infrequent. The entire reason why I am writing these weekly missives is that I wish to rise "above" the divisive and destructive nature of our politics. No one is currently winning anything since the cost of winning seems to be that we all are losing something.
Our current culture has been monopolized by two narratives that are overconfident and under-empathetic. They both think they have answers to THEIR problems without properly recognizing that other people might have other problems requiring different solutions.
I have written much about the problem with our media habits and filter bubbles and the problems arising from a narrow diet of perspectives. In order for us to develop new ideas to address new and changing challenges, we need to be more exposed to unfamiliar and different perspectives. And that only comes as a result of inviting a broader set of voices and ideas to the conversation. Ask any scientist or innovator—the quality of ideas is often a function of the quantity of ideas.
As we get older, we typically lose some of our curiosity. We get set in our ways. We have tried many things and found what works for us. The wheels on our bus are now firmly stuck in their own tracks and it seems harder and harder to find new paths. Some of this, I must confess, is the beauty of getting older. You don't have to come up with new solutions for every new situation. You have seen that movie before.
But it's also a big problem. Particularly when systems are in desperate need of renewal and change, especially in the age of rapidly shifting technology and production. It's not lost on me that one reason for the state of our politics is that the average age of our congress has grown considerably in the last 20 years. The people that created the problem we are in are rarely the same people who can challenge and change them. This is why I am so fond of venture capital. An entire industry dedicated to betting on new ideas that can bring new solutions to our biggest and most pressing problems. What does a venture capital take on politics look like? Term limits, for sure. And Final Five Voting that I have written about before are good ideas in that direction.
Since I am older now, I recognize this challenge firsthand. I try to be mindful when I instinctively apply my solution to a problem. You know the saying that states that "if your only tool is a hammer, you will look at every problem as a nail". I have to imagine that there are new problems that require solutions outside of my own experience. As frustrating as that is.
The silver lining is that I can work on this. It's an excuse to learn and grow. And it's a self-fulfilling prophecy of sorts. The more I work on my capacity to reframe and rethink old idea patterns, the easier that actually becomes. It's like stretching. The more you do it, the more flexible you get. But it is, for sure, hard and takes work. That's another reason I force myself to write these weekly newsletters. I get to practice embracing new ideas.
Another way to look at our incapacity for renewal is to look at companies. Which, of course, is nothing more than a collective of human beings. They tend to peak and stall fairly young. The average age of a corporation is only 21 years in 2020, down from 31 years in 1965. And both are much shorter than the average age of a human. Why is that?
Well, I have seen it. Many times. Nothing fails like success. Success, while far more agreeable than failure, is still a problem. It produces arrogance, invincibility, and ultimately self-centeredness. If you don't believe me, try changing something that has succeeded!
I have been a change agent most of my life and have the scars to prove it! Anyone trying to change an existing system knows how hard that is to do. Machiavelli expressed the problem with initiating change the best:
“It should be borne in mind that there is nothing more difficult to handle, more doubtful of success, and more dangerous to implement than initiating change. Innovation makes enemies of all those who prospered under the old regime, and only lukewarm support is forthcoming from those who would prosper under the new
”
This brings me to our team. And the people we surround ourselves with. Who utters a contrarian's voice? We often like people to have our back, got your 6, (military term for having one’s back referring to the 6 o’clock position), and be on our team. That's all super important, of course. But who on your team takes the other side? Who do you invite to be your challenger? Anyone? And do you do it with love, appreciation, and celebration?
This is really hard. I know full well. When someone says something critical, it's so easy to take it personally. To assume that the intentions are somehow directed at me. But they rarely are. They are about something I believe. Not something I am.
This is very much at the core of our broader societal division right now. Too many people walk around with their guards held up high. Their armor is fully on. We send signals to our surroundings that we are NOT OPEN for anything different. We are closed. Walls are erected and distances between people grow.
I know I have failed here many times. I am trying harder to see criticism and challenges as a gift. Because they are. I just need to learn to get past the initial sting. Reflection and pausing are good ways of doing just that. When something hurts, just write down what exactly bothered you, then sleep on it. Take a walk. Take a few breaths. Read it the next day and the gift of the message will become clearer. Even if your opinion does not change, you may understand with greater clarity why you believe what you do. That, too, is a gift.
This problem, of not having people on the other side, is even more evident with the most successful people (and companies as mentioned above). We know from history that this can be very dangerous, and we are also seeing it with the war in Ukraine and in other regions challenged by conflict.
The most successful people never got to where they are by being pushovers. They are stubborn, resilient, and sometimes even very difficult. And the more they succeed the fewer challenges they tend to receive.
Enter Elon Musk.
First, let me be absolutely clear: I am a HUGE fan of Elon. I have been forever and I find that most criticism around him is unfair, unbalanced, and lacks the proper respect for his incredible achievements. Elon has done more for our world than just about anyone I can think of. He has accelerated the global transition towards sustainable energy, reduced barriers to entering space, and now working on the future of our brains, traffic congestion—you name it. Big, big problems that require a new level of thinking that only people as gifted as Elon can pull off. We should be more grateful than suspicious.
The Twitter acquisition has been contentious. I don't have any insights here or even a point of view. I can see why a healthier Twitter can be really important in contributing to a better public discourse. And I believe that is what Elon really is trying to accomplish. And I trust that his intentions are pure and that he will find a way to get there. And as with any worthwhile endeavor, it will not get done without overcoming many known and unknown challenges.
Now enter Chris Sacca. Chris is one of the most successful venture investors in modern times. He also happens to be close to Elon. He wrote, on Twitter nonetheless, an important thread that I found to be a good example of the kind of feedback we all need.
I am sharing his thread here. Please click on this link and simply read the tweets by scrolling down. We can all learn from this. Profanity and some opinions unfit for the spirit of his argument, aside, I found his points meaningful. Regardless of whether you find yourself agreeing with Chris, Elon or neither, just consider the spirit of the conversation. I found it to be a good example of exactly the type of exchange around an important topic that we need more of. And perhaps even more so, the topic is around how to improve our public square so it's particularly pertinent. Chris obviously admires and knows Elon, he even adores Twitter, and yet he is raising some concerns from "the other side". He’s not criticizing just to be a critic. He does it with proper care and he is clearly interested in helping. Not hurting. That's the key point here.
I invite all of you to please do the same with me. Many of you do. For that, I am immensely grateful. Having difficult conversations is something we all need to work on. Today more than ever. And yes, they are difficult. But perhaps the message here today is that we can all contribute to making them less difficult. Lower our guard. Take off our armor. And just dance effortlessly between the good and the ugly, the positive and the negative, all with less judgment and less emotion.
Have a great week!
