Are You Celebrating Enough?
Friends!
This week, I am in a different mindset. Honoring my wife Jessica's birthday on Tuesday happily served as a much-needed catalyst away from all the crises, bad news, friction, division, and drama surrounding this past year. While not much else changed around me, the candles, the cake, and the gifts all carried a meaningful message: a deep sense of gratitude for what I love most in life.
Fortunately, the next morning, I awoke to even more birthdays to celebrate. And I was again reminded how much happier and humanly centered I was when spending some time showing appreciation and celebrating someone else. Two days in a row doesn't make a habit. (Yet.) But it certainly got me thinking. And feeling.
So, what is it about gratitude and celebration that feels so good?
Well, for starters, it is liberating to not think about yourself. The inner voice in our heads is a tad self-centered, isn't it? To silence that voice and instead focus on how lucky I am to have a certain person in my life is a welcomed escape. In fact, we don't even have to sit and think about it. It’s even simpler. Just feel. And then express that feeling! Perhaps that is what seems so refreshing. There is really no competition, no winning, no agenda. It's free from political sentiment, judgment, and expectations. Just sheer celebration of an immutable truth in your life. “I’m so happy you were born.” It's pure and it's beautiful. It helps remind me of the best version of myself.
But, hang on. Why just birthdays?
We do celebrate mothers and fathers. We celebrate holidays. We celebrate all sorts of achievements. And that's good. But can we bring this sentiment to everyday life? Can celebration be a habit we shape with more frequency? Would that ultimately make us happier and bring more joy to this world? I bet you the answer is yes.
The best part is that insincerity won’t work as well. Thankfully, the arc of the moral universe of celebration, indeed, bends towards justice. The experiential rewards of celebrating something inauthentically are never as generous as when you truly mean it. The more you give, the more you get. For sure.
So, when celebrating, we should do it with full force, full intention, and try to completely lose ourselves in another. As Abraham Joshua Heschel so accurately says below: It's an active state.
“People of our time are losing the power of celebration. Instead of celebrating we seek to be amused or entertained. Celebration is an active state, an act of expressing reverence or appreciation. To be entertained is a passive state—it is to receive pleasure afforded by an amusing act or a spectacle.... Celebration is a confrontation, giving attention to the transcendent meaning of one’s actions. ”
— ABRAHAM JOSHUA HESCHEL
One of the companies that I have the honor to serve, where I also get to practice more of the art of celebration is Susie Cakes. Their mission is connecting through celebration. Susan Sarich, founder and CEO, was inspired by her two grandmothers, Mildred and Madeline, and how their recipes helped bring Susan closer to traditions, tastes, and the value of time with people we care most about. Susan took their recipes and has built a wonderful culture and business around helping thousands of people show their appreciation for people all around the country. And along the way also celebrate the power of women in the workforce. In her own words:
“You most likely recall a cake as part of your life’s milestone celebrations. Cake has the unique ability to connect us with the people and events of our past. However, cake should not be reserved only for these special occasions. A delicious slice of cake can immediately bring a bit of celebration to an ordinary day. I hope you enjoy SusieCakes on your special occasions, as well as all the days in between.”
There is something powerful about the idea of a slice of celebration. We need it now more than ever. I am going to commit myself to find something to celebrate every day. Jessica starts each day with her own micro-habit celebrating the beginning of a new great day. It's a good practice that is slowly bringing intentional positive energy to our entire home. Love it.
Beyond birthdays (that should not be missed), there are so many other opportunities to celebrate people we care about. And it doesn't even have to be a special day. Some of the most powerful forms of celebrations are when you just reach out to someone that means a lot to you and tell them just that. With no other intention. It feels great. And I don't do it often enough for sure. I will try to change that starting right now.
In fact, while I am at it: to all of you that are reading this newsletter, I am sending extra love and appreciation. Your feedback, engagement, and continued support make this endeavor a really meaningful one. Without you, this would be a pointless exercise. So, thank you! I wish there was a way to send you a slice of Susie Cakes. I am open to ideas on how!
I loved this post by Prof. Scott Galloway about his appreciation for Cy Cordner and what that rather chance encounter ended up meaning for Scott's own development and life and how he later in life found him and rekindled a relationship rooted in gratitude. Beautiful.
This is a relevant and timely piece by Nicholas Kristof at NYT about how to talk to people with a different point of view. This entire newsletter series is about "elevating our conversation" and the central theme here is around humility and curiosity. Two attitudes really worth celebrating.
This is a good short YouTube clip on gratitude that unpacks WHY gratitude is so helpful to health and happiness.
I just have to end with Kool & The Gang's CELEBRATION song. Always brings a smile to my face and makes me want to dance!
So, to wrap up. Thank you for being here. Please report back if you experience anything noteworthy as you set out to celebrate more around you. Together, I think we all can make a difference by sending more waves of celebration all around.
John Wooden, the celebrated basketball coach who has offered so many inspiring ideas said beautifully:
"There is a wonderful, almost mystical, law of nature that says three of the things we want most—happiness, freedom, and peace of mind—are always attained when we give them to others. Give it away to get it back."
Thank you!
